


River

by hotfruits



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Online Dating, Aromantic, Multi, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-30 01:48:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6403711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotfruits/pseuds/hotfruits
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jackson meets River, the girl of his dreams, on an online dating site; except she isn't a girl, and his name isn't River - it's Choi Youngjae.</p><p>aka sometimes falling in love the second time is even better than the first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	River

**Author's Note:**

> based on this prompt @ 7fics on tumblr: Both boys sign up for a college dating site. They meet the other boy, thinking that he is a girl. They fall in love online and decide to meet in person (Jackson flying from Hong Kong) and they wait for hours for each other (both looking for girls) at the air port, even though they're right next to each other. Finally Jackson calls Youngjae and Youngjae answers sitting next to him. Ending is up to writer, but I hope it's fluffy!

Warnings: swearing. some mentions of sexual content. aromantic!youngjae.  
Word Count: 6518  
Author: [Jessica](http://hotfruits)

A/N: hey y’all it’s been awhile ^^ so this jackjae took me forevvvver to finish, mostly because I’m a perfectionist and I also got really sick orz. I hope you like it, anon! 

* * *

Mark is the one who originally suggests he try online dating. “It’s pretty easy,” he says, scrolling through his bookmarks until he finds the website he’s looking for, opening it in a new window. “See, here’s my profile.”

Jackson squints down at the computer screen. “Dude, you’re not that tall,” he snickers, prompting Mark to reach behind him and punch Jackson in the hip. He hisses and shove Mark’s shoulder in retaliation, making the other lurch forward and nearly smack his laptop with his forehead.

“Fuck off, everyone lies on these things!” Mark scoffs in response, rolling his eyes. He clicks on his messages and begins replying to the various girls he’s chatting with. “It’s all in good fun, and…” he trails off, momentarily distracted as a new message pops up. He reads it quickly and then twists in his seat, looking up at Jackson with a devilish grin. “And if you’re lucky, some honey will ask you to come spend the night.”

Jackson snorts and watches in amusement as Mark grabs his backpack and begins shoving clothes, his toothbrush, and several condoms into the various pockets. “Don’t wait up!” he shouts as he throws his backpack over his shoulder and blows Jackson a kiss, who pretends to catch it and throw it on the ground, stomping on it.

“Rude!” Mark shouts as the door shuts behind him, but his grin doesn’t waver. Of course he’s happy, Jackson thinks to himself, as he plops down in front of Mark’s laptop. He’s getting laid tonight, while Jackson’s plans consist of making instant ramen and watching cartoons in his underwear; he does, for a brief moment, contemplate fucking with Mark’s online profile – which the idiot had left open – but decides to be a good friend and logs out instead.

Instantly, the website takes him back to the home page, which displays various pictures of happy couples and groups of friends laughing together. It appears the website isn’t just for dating, but can also be used to make friends from all over of Asia, as well.

Jackson stares at it for another moment and then sighs, admitting defeat; he’s not really the fuck ‘em and leave ‘em type, but maybe he could meet a nice girl on here, or at least make some new friends. He clicks on the signup page and begins to type in his information, fibbing about his height – it’s not his fault he’s so short – and adding a little blurb about his personality, before hitting submit.

“And…done!” he says, after his profile picture finishes uploading, the small icon displaying his fencing gear.

It only took a few hours for him to receive his first message, from a girl named River in Seoul. Her profile picture was of an adorable white puppy, dressed cutely in a yellow sweater. “Hey!” her message reads, followed by several smiling emojis. “Fencing is so cool! How long have you been doing it?”

And that’s where it all begins, the moment Jackson replies to River’s message. The friendship starts off small, talking about their academics and extracurriculars – “I teach piano and do some vocal coaching, for extra money” – but soon, they’re talking about their dumb roommates, silly family members, and everything in between.

At first, he finds it strange how comfortable he feels with her; but over the course of the next month, as spring finally turns into summer, he finds it really doesn’t matter. River is amazing, and so what if he doesn’t know what she looks like? He really, really likes her.

Which is probably what prompted his sudden decision, despite knowing River for only two months. “Dude, seriously?” Mark questions as he sits beside him on their ratty couch, tsking at him when his eyes glance at Jackson’s laptop. “You don’t even know what this chick looks like!”

“That’s because, unlike you,” he points an accusatory finger in Mark’s direction, “I don’t care about a woman’s looks. She could have a hump and I’d still adore her, because she’d still be River. And besides,” he grins, clicking the final button and confirming his flight to Seoul at the end of the month, “Our first time seeing each other will actually be the first time. It’s so fucking romantic, dude.”

Mark shakes his head at him, but Jackson pays him no mind. He’s going to meet River, his stomach already buzzing with nervous excitement.

A few weeks and several hours later, Jackson’s stomach is now in twisted knots as he makes his way from the terminal to baggage claim. He can’t help but recall Mark’s concerns as he walks, wondering if there was some validity to them; what if River wasn’t River, like what if she had been catfishing him along and it turns out this wonderful girl was actually an old, creepy man who was going to sell him into prostitution?

“Deep breaths, man, deep breaths,” he reminds himself, quickly finding his luggage and taking a seat in front of the Starbucks, per River’s instructions. He begins to breathe in and out, slowly, trying to calm his racing heart and frantic nerves. He doesn’t forget to keep an eye out for River, though, who said she’d be dressed in all black and wearing a big, red hat.

He pulls out his phone and turns it back on, sending a quick text to Mark that he landed safely. “Hope she doesn’t sell your organs on the black market!” his ever-supportive best friend replies, making him groan in annoyance. He exits out of his texts and pulls up the website app, quickly locating his messages. He looks for the one River sent him just before his flight, which contained her cell phone number.

He finds it and taps on the digits, which gives him the option to call her; and before he can psych himself out even more, he hits the call button and brings the phone to his ear. He nearly jumps in surprise, though, when a quiet medley begins to play from his left, a familiar and soothing tune. _That’s got to be her!_ he realizes, as he lowers his phone and turns his head, catching sight of a big, red hat in his peripheral.

Suddenly, his stomach plummets to what feels like his feet, while nauseas bubbles up along his throat, making it hard to breathe. “River?” he chokes out, staring at the other with a look of utter disbelief.

River smiles carefully at him, brown eyes full of concern. “Actually, you can call me Youngjae,” he responds with a slight smile, his accented English sounding odd to Jackson’s ears. River – Youngjae, Jackson corrects himself – extends a hand towards him, still smiling.

Jackson stares at the offered hand and wonders what the fuck he’s gotten himself into.

 

Jackson can’t say he’s surprised when Mark begins to laugh, but it’s unappreciated, nonetheless. “It’s not funny,” he murmurs, falling back onto Youngjae’s bed with a sigh. After a tense taxi ride from the airport, Jackson had feigned exhaustion and requested a moment to freshen up – alone – which Youngjae accepted with no problem. He guided Jackson to his bedroom and then closed the door behind him, saying he’d be in the kitchen if needed.

Jackson sighs once more and sinks further into Youngjae’s comforter, breathing in the smell of lavender. His head lolls to the side as he glances at the nightstand, which contains framed photos of him and what appears to be his family, along with a worn composition book and a few figurines from his favorite anime.

 _That’s right, I know his favorite anime._ “It’s a little funny,” Mark replies, and Jackson sniffs in response. “Oh, dude, don’t…fuck, don’t cry,” he says, his tone softening as he attempts to comfort Jackson over the phone. “At least he isn’t creepy?”

“I feel like such an idiot!” Jackson whines, hoping Youngjae can’t hear him from the kitchen. “I assumed I was talking to a girl, based on a stupid name and profile picture. I mean, what kinda guy dresses up his dog, right?”

Mark doesn’t respond right away, probably searching for the right words to say. “Okay,” he finally says, catching Jackson’s attention, “Do you remember what you said to me, when you booked your flight?”

Jackson shakes his head, but then remembers that Mark can’t see him. “No,” he replies, sitting up and glancing over at the keyboard in the corner.

“You told me it didn’t matter what River looked like,” Mark says, his voice hushed. Jackson stands up and runs a hand through his hair, messing up the blonde strands even more. “You said she could have a hump and you’d still like her, because it’s still River.”

“Yeah, _her!_ Emphasis on the _her,_ dude!” Jackson shoots back, but then flinches, realizing how he sounds. “Look, you know I’ve got nothing against gays, man. I’m just not one, okay?”

“And I never said you were,” Mark huffs, and Jackson can practically see the other rolling his eyes. “I’m just saying, you developed feelings for this person without ever seeing their face,” he pauses, and despite knowing what Mark is going to say next, the words still hit him like a punch to the gut, “Youngjae is River, Jackson.”

“You think I don’t fucking know that?” Jackson hisses, glaring at a framed photo of Youngjae on the wall, who was smiling big for the camera, while his fingers danced along the piano keys. “I’m not an idiot! I just…” he breathes out, angrily, as the tension continues to mount in his muscles. “It’s not what I imagined, and now I don’t know–”

A quiet knock interrupts him, causing Jackson to jump. He stutters out a quick goodbye and hangs up, just as the door begins to creak open. “Hey,” Youngjae smiles softly at him, slipping into the door and easing the door shut behind him. “Um, sorry,” he apologizes, glancing away from Jackson’s face and down at the floor, “Bambam will be home any minute, and I figured–”

“Oh, yeah,” Jackson scratches the back of his neck. That’s right, he has two roommates…Yugyeom and Bambam. “Hey, listen, I’m–”

“So–”

They both pause, meeting each other’s eyes. Jackson can see the insecurity and fear in those brown orbs, and he realizes with a start that his feelings aren’t the only ones at stake here. “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving,” Jackson speaks up, his shoulders sagging as he chuckles quietly, “Let’s get some dinner?”

Youngjae nods, smiling hesitantly at Jackson.

They end up getting barbeque for dinner, much to Jackson’s delight. A full belly – and several shots of soju – gives Jackson enough courage to confess to Youngjae. The other listens to him carefully, and when Jackson’s confession comes to a stuttering end, he takes his bottom lip in between his teeth and tugs at the already torn flesh.

“Hey, stop,” Jackson reaches across the table and slaps Youngjae on the chest, feeling the other’s soft muscles through his thin t-shirt.

Youngjae releases his lip, with only a few specks of blood marring the pink skin. “Man,” he shakes his head, chuckling sarcastically, “And here I was, worrying you thought I was fat or ugly, or something.”

“You’re not fat,” Jackson replies automatically, and Youngjae snorts. “Or ugly. You’re actually really gorgeous,” he blushes, clearing his throat, “In like, a bro way, of course.”

Youngjae rolls his eyes. “You sound like such an American,” he teases, pouring another shot for himself. He downs it and then pours another, quickly drinking that one as well. “So, are you going to fly back to Hong Kong, then?”

He can’t lie, Jackson had considered that option during their walk to the barbeque place. It was definitely the easiest choice, and one that would spare the two of them any more discomfort and pain. Jackson was never one to run from a challenge, though, and he didn’t want to lose River – Youngjae – just like that; plus, he had spent all that money…

“No,” he says, and Youngjae genuinely seems surprised by his answer. “I know I fucked this up, but maybe we can start over? Instead of River and Jackson, let’s be Youngjae and Jackson…friends,” he adds, so as not to give Youngjae the wrong idea.

Youngjae stares at him for a moment, considering Jackson’s words; a minute passes by, and Jackson begins to panic, convinced that Youngjae is going to hate him forever, when a small smile creeps up on his face. “Okay, sure,” he says, reaching his fist across the table. Jackson bumps it with his own and giggles when Youngjae whispers the words fa la la la under his breath, his fingers wiggling as he pulls his arm back.

 _This’ll be good,_ Jackson thinks, as Youngjae pours another shot for Jackson.

Youngjae and Jackson, friends.

 

Becoming friends with Youngjae – for the second time – was a lot easier than Jackson had anticipated. Their first day together was a little awkward, spent mostly in front of the TV and watching dramas with Youngjae’s roommates, while making small talk in between commercial breaks.

On the second and third day, they actually got out of the house and did some sightseeing, which seemed to help make them feel a little more comfortable in each other’s presence; Youngjae was also a very humorous tour guide, often throwing in random anecdotes about the first time he visited these places, when he moved from Mokpo to Seoul.

He made Youngjae laugh on the fourth day, like eyes watering, practically hyperventilating as he crashed into Jackson’s arms, kind of laugh. It was pretty cute, Jackson had to admit; but even more than that, he enjoyed watching the other laugh so freely, especially when he had, up until that point, kept his guard up around Jackson.

On the seventh day, Jackson woke up from his spot on the couch with Youngjae’s puppy, Coco, fast asleep on his chest and a sticky note attached to his hand. “Something came up with one of my students and I have to go meet him, so I won’t be able to take you to Myeongdong. But I already asked Bambam and he said that he and Yugyeom would take you, which is probably better, since they’re more fashionable than me~!” Jackson pauses to giggle at the little doodle Youngjae drew after the exclamation point, which was of himself in sweatpants and a fedora. “Have fun and I’ll see you later!”

Jackson sticks the note onto the coffee table and then yawns, one hand carding through his tangled locks, while the other settles on Coco’s head. The puppy made a small huffing sound as he scratched her behind the ears, before perking up and lifting her head to lick his hand. “At least you like me,” he smiles down at the puppy, now scratching under her chin and making her back leg kick; if only it was that easy to get Bambam to like him.

 _Speak of the devil._ Jackson watches as Bambam enters the room, his sleek pajama pants hanging low on his hips and his burgundy hair a disheveled mess. He ignores Jackson’s silent wave and walks into the kitchen, turning on the coffee machine. It buzzes for a moment, and soon the sweet aroma of coffee beans permeate the apartment, rousing Yugyeom from his shared room with Bambam.

“Good morning,” Yugyeom greets him with a smile, definitely the nicer of the two. He enters the kitchen and accepts the cup Bambam offers him, before chatting with the other in rapid Korean. Of course, Jackson can’t understand a word they say, but he does catch his name, along with Youngjae’s, and assumes they’re talking about their shopping trip for the day.

His assumptions are confirmed when Bambam brings him a cup of lukewarm coffee, an annoyed look in his eyes. “So, I guess we’re taking you shopping today, huh?” he says, clicking his tongue at the end of his sentence.

“You don’t have to,” Jackson offers, giving Bambam a means to back out; besides, it’s not like he couldn’t find the shopping district on his own. Bambam just clicks his tongue again, though, and tells him to be ready in one hour.

Bambam and Yugyeom leave the room, no doubt in order to get ready. Jackson decides to skip showering and laze around for another forty-five minutes, absentmindedly petting Coco with one hand and texting Mark with the other. Once the clock read 11:45, he leaves the couch and quickly washes his face and brushes his teeth, before throwing on a hoodie over his black tank top and slipping on a pair of torn jeans. After lacing up his boots and shoving a snapback over his tangled hair, Jackson declares himself ready and waits by the front door for the other two.

Unsurprisingly, Bambam looks like a million dollars when he steps out of the room with Yugyeom, his outfit and makeup on point. Yugyeom, on the other hand, is dressed more similarly to Jackson, with torn jeans and a snapback covering his messy hair.

“Let’s go,” Bambam says, grabbing his keys and pushing past Jackson to exit the apartment. He follows the haughty boy with a roll of his eyes, which Yugyeom responds to with an apologetic smile.

The train ride to Myeongdong is uneventful, with Bambam and Yugyeom talking mostly amongst themselves. Yugyeom attempts to converse with him a few times, but due to his limited English and Jackson’s non-existent Korean, the conversations quickly die out. Jackson doesn’t mind, though, and enjoys the silence as he watches the people on the train.

It doesn’t take long until Bambam announces their arrival, practically bouncing out of his seat and off the train. Yugyeom and Jackson hurry after him, following the diva up and out of the tunnel. Once they’re on the ground, Jackson can’t help but look up in amazement at all of the shops, his eyes jumping from one sign to the next.

“Whoa,” he breathes out, making Yugyeom chuckle as he takes him by the elbow and begins to drag him along. “Hey, I can walk!” Jackson shouts, his fingers reaching for Yugyeom’s ribs and giving them a tickle.

Yugyeom giggles and scurries away, until he’s several paces in front of him and Bambam. “He’s such a kid sometimes,” Bambam comments, shaking his head fondly at the other; Jackson is surprised Bambam is speaking to him in such a friendly tone, but hey, he ain’t complaining. “My girlfriend, Jimin–”

“Yugyeom introduced you two, right? Or was it Yerin?” Jackson asks, unintentionally interrupting Bambam. He knows Youngjae told him the story at one point, but he can’t recall the details at the moment. Jackson waits for an answer, but once he glances over at Bambam and sees the other’s annoyed stare, he blushes and apologizes.

“Huh, sometimes I forgot that you and Youngjae dated online,” Bambam says instead, and Jackson visibly flinches. “C’mon, you’ll like this store,” he grabs Jackson’s hand and drags him into the H&M, shouting over his shoulder for Yugyeom to follow them.

The three of them end up shopping for several hours, despite Jackson’s desire to get as far away from Bambam as possible; he doesn’t know why the other keeps making little quips about his and Youngjae’s relationship, but it’s beginning to really upset him. Yeah, he fucked up, but does that give Bambam the right to torment him?

Thankfully, the torture ends as they head back to the apartment in the late afternoon, arms ladened with several bags of clothes, souvenirs, and beauty products. Jackson carries his bags into Youngjae’s room and tosses them onto the floor, before collapsing onto the bed. He groans, from the physical and emotional exhaustion, but stops when he feels the bed dip beside him.

He turns his head and sees Bambam skinny legs. “What’s up?” he asks, resisting the urge to tell the other to fuck off.

“I’m sorry I’ve been a jerk,” Bambam starts, his manicured fingers twisting in his lap. “But you hurt one of my best friends.”

“I know.”

Bambam shakes his head. “No, you don’t. Youngjae is the nicest guy in the world, but he’s always had bad luck with relationships. It’s really hard for him, being the way he is.”

“What, gay?” Jackson asks, confused.

Bambam shakes his head again, this time with a heavy sigh as well. “He’s not gay, Jackson. He’s aromantic.” Bambam finally looks over at him, meeting Jackson’s eyes with a frown. “…you don’t know what that is, do you?” he asks, and after Jackson’s mumbled no, continues, “A person who is aromantic is unable to experience romantic attraction.”

“…what?”

“It’s hard to explain,” Bambam admits, picking at one of his cuticles. “I’m not like Youngjae, so I don’t really understand either, but he’s never going to have crushes on someone or fall madly in love. The most he can experience is a deep, emotional connection…and he really wants that, Jackson.”

Jackson felt his body go cold, as he swallows past the sudden lump in his throat. “And he felt that with me, huh?”

“Yeah,” is all Bambam says, before patting Jackson’s thigh and leaving the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Jackson closes his eyes and curses under his breath; god, he had no idea…and for him to just…to say they should only be friends, after Youngjae finally found that connection…

He’s never going to make this right, is he?

No wonder Bambam hates him so much. He’s starting to hate himself a lot, too.

 

After a long conversation with Mark and a quiet walk around the block with Coco, Youngjae finally returns home. “You’ll never believe this,” he says, smiling as he enters his bedroom and curls up beside Jackson. “A representative from JYP entertainment scouted two of my students and asked them to come audition.”

“Which ones?” Jackson asks, rolling onto his side and facing Youngjae with a soft smile.

“Jinyoung and Jaebum, they’re juniors in high school,” he replies, a proud grin on his face. The names definitely sound familiar, and it only takes Jackson a moment to recall all of the times Youngjae has gushed about them, going on and on about how talented they are.

“I’m so happy for them,” he continues, but then pauses as a loud yawn tumbles from his throat. His face scrunches up as he yawns, and Jackson feels a strong urge to reach over and boop Youngjae on the nose; thankfully, he’s able to keep his impulsivity in check.

“You’re so cute.”

Well, mostly in check.

Youngjae laughs in response, shaking his head at Jackson and slapping him on the chest. “I’m not cute, man, I’m…manly!” he slaps him again, “And handsome!” he finishes, slapping him one more time, despite Jackson’s pleas for mercy.

“And surprisingly strong, shit,” Jackson furrows his brows, eyeing the other warily as he rubs his sore chest. Youngjae continues to laugh, though, so Jackson begins to pout, staring up at Youngjae with big, sad eyes. He blinks slowly, and when Youngjae begins to snicker, he adds in an extra sad, extra pathetic lip wobble.

“Ah, stop, it’s too cute!” Youngjae shouts, covering his face with his hands.

Triumphant, Jackson beams at Youngjae and scoots closer to him, cuddling up next to the other. “The Wang Puppy stare can never be beaten!” he exclaims, expecting Youngjae to either laugh or slap him again; Youngjae freezes instead, though, and that’s when Jackson realizes the situation they’re in.

“Ah, I’m sorry!” he apologizes and begins to wiggle away, but is stopped by Youngjae’s hand on his shoulder. “I’m really sorry, man, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable!” he continues to apologize, but then finds himself rambling, “I’m just a really cuddly guy, ask anyone, but I know things are weird and you’re aromatic, so–”

“Wait,” Youngjae interrupts him, his eyes narrowing, “…do you mean _aromantic?”_

Jackson nods, figuring it’s in his best interest to keep his mouth shut.

Youngjae sighs in exasperation, and Jackson can feel his hand clench on his shoulder. “I’m assuming one of them told you,” he mumbles, referring to his roommates with a grimace. “For the record, though, just because I’m aromantic, doesn’t mean I don’t like to cuddle. I love cuddling, man.”

Jackson smiles at that, covering Youngjae’s hand with his own and giving it a squeeze. “Cuddling is the best,” he agrees, pleased when Youngjae laughs in response; and as he laughs, the tension that had begun to pollute the room fades away, leaving only a quiet, relaxing atmosphere in its wake.

As they lay beside each other, hand over hand and legs almost touching, Jackson can’t help but recall all of the times he had wished for this moment; or, a moment to similar to it, where River is wrapped up in his embrace, her eyes slipping closed as she falls asleep in his arms.

Maybe it’s not the moment he dreamed of, but Jackson can’t deny how peaceful this feels. “You can stay here, if you want,” Youngjae whispers between them, and Jackson squeezes his hand in response.

 

Over the course of the next few days, Jackson feels a change in their dynamics; or, to be more precise, things are like how they used to be. He feels comfortable in Youngjae’s presence and is able to talk to him with ease, similar to the way they used to talk for hours and hours about everything and nothing.

There’s also more cuddling now, which is odd at first. He finds himself gauging Youngjae’s reactions when he snuggles up with him on the couch, or leans into space on the train, yawning tiredly after a day of adventuring. Youngjae never seems to mind, though, often reciprocating Jackson’s cuddles or initiating his own; he even slips his fingers in between Jackson’s one night, during a quiet stroll with Coco through the park.

Overall, things are going great. There’s still one question that continues to bother him, though, but he can never find the right moment to ask. He doesn’t want to bring it up when they’re having fun outside or stuffing their faces with delicious food, and he definitely doesn’t want to bring it up when Youngjae’s head is resting in the crook of his neck, his hand gently rubbing Jackson’s stomach while the radio plays.

He knows he’ll have to ask soon, though, especially as his departure date approaches. It just doesn’t make sense, after months of talking and sharing so many secrets, that Youngjae would keep his romantic orientation a secret. Was he ashamed? Or, even worse…did he think Jackson wouldn’t accept him? The thought alone has his stomach twisting in knots and his lips falling into a frown.

He jumps when he feels a finger poking him in the ribs and looks down at where Youngjae’s head is resting in his lap. “Hey, you alright?” Youngjae asks, staring up at him with a look of concern, his bare toes wiggling in the dry grass. “Jackson?”

Jackson glances over at Bambam and Yugyeom, who are engaged in a fierce Frisbee battle with their girlfriends. He then directs his attention back to Youngjae, noticing – once more – how cute he looks curled up on the picnic blanket, his big eyes watching Jackson and a slight pout on his bitten lips.

“I’m alright, just thinking,” he murmurs, shifting so that he can support himself with one hand and run the other through Youngjae’s hair. His face scrunches up in response, and Jackson giggles as he asks, “Why are you so cute?”

“Good genes?” Youngjae offers, shrugging a little.

Jackson’s hand tightens in Youngjae’s hair, just for a second. “Speaking of,” he says, ignoring Youngjae’s curious expression, “I was wondering…because, you know, we had talked about it online, but did you still,” he licks his bottom lip, wetting it. “Did you still want me to meet your family? I mean, I only have two more days left in Seoul…”

Youngjae’s mouth drops open, forming a small o. “Um, I already told them that we couldn’t meet up,” he says, smiling awkwardly. “It just made sense, considering the situation.”

The situation where we’re not dating, right. Maybe it’s the guilt, or his usual penchant for blurting out the first thing that comes to mind, that has him spilling out, “Well, next time, then!”

“Next time?” Youngjae repeats, his brows raised.

Jackson swallowed heavily, his hand stilling in Youngjae’s hair. “Well, yeah! It’d be fun, right?” he chuckles, feeling a small amount of sweat break out on his forehead.

Youngjae blinks at him, but then shrugs, grinning. “Yeah, that’d be fun!” he agrees, and then adds, “Maybe I can visit you in Hong Kong, too.”

When his feelings for River had first began to develop, he wondered what it would be like when she met the important people in his life. His parents would love her, of course, while his brother would tease them and share all of Jackson’s embarrassing childhood stories. Mark would be quiet at first, but once they got to know each other, he thinks they’d get along just fine.

Now, though, he wonders what it would be like if Youngjae met them. His mom would absolutely love him, especially his ridiculous laugh and charming personality. His dad, upon learning that Youngjae was a music major, would ask him all kinds of questions about his field and expertise. His brother would still try to embarrass him, with Youngjae loving every minute of it. And Mark…well, it’d be awkward for awhile, considering their different personalities, but he’s positive the two of them could be really great friends.

“I’d really like that, actually,” Jackson admits with a blush, surprising himself. “But don’t bring Coco, or Mark will try and steal her.”

Youngjae snorts. “I’ve seen pictures of Mark. I could totally take him.”

The two erupt in a fit of laughter, Youngjae nearly hyperventilating from the force of his laughs, while Jackson’s cackles echo around them. He catches the others glancing over at them in his peripheral, curious smiles on their faces; Bambam included, which surprises him. He’s gotten pretty used to the other’s haughty glares or annoyed frowns, so seeing him smile is definitely throwing him for a loop.

 _Weird,_ he thinks to himself, as their laughter dies down; _maybe he’s starting to hate me less?_ Just as he’s about to lose himself in his thoughts once more, Youngjae’s ringtone draws him back to the present. He watches as Youngjae answers the phone with a frown, greeting the other person in Korean – he thinks he heard the name Jinyoung, but isn’t sure – and chatting with them for several moments, before hanging up with a groan.

“What’s wrong?”

Youngjae sits up and begins to put on his socks and shoes, answering Jackson’s question while he laces his converse. “Jinyoung is freaking out about his audition,” he rolls his eyes, but Jackson can see the underlying concern in those brown orbs. “It’s not for another two weeks, but he’s really stressing out, so I’m going to go see him. You can–”

“Can I come with you?” Jackson interrupts, putting on his socks and shoes as well. Youngjae stares at him for a moment, but then nods, grinning. “Sweet!” Jackson cheers, jumping to his feet and then helping Youngjae onto his own. “I can finally see the master at work.”

Youngjae scoffs at him and then runs over to Yugyeom, quickly speaking with him. Yugyeom nods in response and claps him on the back, Youngjae returning the gesture with a grin. He then waves to Bambam and the girls, before jogging back over to him. “Let’s go!” he says, grabbing Jackson’s hand and tugging him towards the subway.

They hop onto the train that’ll take them towards Jinyoung’s home, making idle chat along the bumpy ride. Their hands remained joined for the entire ride, despite several curious and disgusted stares. Normally, Jackson would be bothered by such unfriendly attention, but Youngjae’s hand is warm and he seems okay with it, so Jackson shrugs off the hate with ease.

After twenty minutes, they reach their destination and Youngjae knocks on the pale blue door. Some punk with gauges and several other piercings answers it, immediately sighing in relief when he sees Youngjae. He addresses Youngjae first, before introducing himself to Jackson, “Hey, I’m Jaebum.”

“Jackson, nice to meet you!” he replies, untangling himself from Youngjae and shaking Jaebum’s hand as they enter the apartment. Youngjae brushes past them and makes his way down the small hallway, with Jackson and Jaebum following behind him. They enter what he assumes is Jinyoung’s room, due to the music sheets strewn all across the floor and the pretty teenager pacing in the middle of it.

“Hyung!” he cries out when he sees Youngjae, throwing himself into the other’s arms and rapidly speaking with him.

Jaebum, who stands next to him, leans down and speaks into his ear. “Jinyoungie is scared, but it’s dumb,” he says, rolling his lined eyes, “He has a beautiful voice.”

“Youngjae speaks highly of him,” Jackson nods, and then adds, “You too, of course. He’s very proud of you guys.”

Jaebum smirks in response, before directing his attention back towards Jinyoung and Youngjae. “Oh, hyung is going to play,” he says, and Jackson follows his line of sight, to where Youngjae is getting situated in front of the keyboard, Jinyoung sitting beside him.

Jackson feels his breath hitch as Youngjae begins to play the opening notes, the beautiful medley filling the room. It’s truly an amazing sight, the way Youngjae’s fingers dance across the keys, so confident and at ease with his skills. Jackson would say it’s the most wonderful thing he’s ever seen, until Youngjae begins to sing, and his heart literally skips a beat.

_Holy shit._

Jackson can hear Jaebum speaking to him once more, but for the life of him, he can’t understand a word the kid says. His entire focus is on Youngjae, mesmerized and entranced by the sweet timbre of his voice.

Once he finishes, Youngjae then begins to coach Jinyoung through the song, breaking it down verse by verse. The kid is good – not as good as Youngjae, but how could anyone compete with someone so perfect? – but Jackson can see why Youngjae thinks so well of him. As they sing together, Jinyoung’s nervous tension begins to fade away, until he’s smiling at the end of the song. He hugs Youngjae and thanks him whole-heartedly, before releasing him so that Youngjae can hug Jaebum as well. Once he’s all done, he slips his hand into Jackson’s and bids the two farewell.

Jackson mumbles a weak goodbye, throwing a thin smile over his shoulder as they leave.

They journey back to Youngjae’s is spent in silence. Youngjae attempts to chat with Jackson at first, but then grows quiet, as well, once he catches onto Jackson’s somber state. He feels terrible for ruining Youngjae’s mood, but he can’t bring himself to converse with the other right now; he’s got far too much on his mind, so many pieces clanging and clicking together.

He knows he’s got to man up, though, as they get to Youngjae’s apartment and Youngjae scoops Coco into his arms, holding the puppy with a sad smile. “Wait,” Jackson reaches for him and grabs Youngjae by the elbow, using his grip to turn the other around. Youngjae complies, but stares down at him with a look of exasperation; not that Jackson could blame him, of course. He knows he’s hurt Youngjae feelings, over and over again, but enough is enough. It’s time for him to be brave and finally tell the other what he’s thinking.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were aromantic?” is what comes out instead; and now that it’s out there, he can’t stop himself. “We talked every day for months, Youngjae, sometimes for hours at a time. How could you keep such an important part of yourself a secret? Were you ashamed? Or…” he pauses, his voice cracking, “Or did you think I wouldn’t accept you?”

“What?” Youngjae sputters, staring at him in shock. “No, of course not!”

“Then why didn’t you tell me?”

“I…I don’t know,” Youngjae sighs, shifting so that Coco can safely jump down from his arms. “I guess I was worried, at first, that you wouldn’t accept me. There’s lot of people, even in the gay community, who look down on people like me.”

“I’m sorry,” Jackson whispers, giving Youngjae’s elbow a squeeze.

Youngjae shrugs off the apology and places his hand over Jackson’s, a slight smile on his face. “To be honest, the closer we got, the more I felt like I didn’t have to tell you. Does that make sense?”

Jackson shakes his head, brows furrowed.

“You were always so respectful and kind,” Youngjae clarifies, his eyes dipping towards the floor as a blush spreads across his cheeks. “And you never seemed weirded out by the way I acted. I mean, even now,” he pauses, taking a deep breath, “You’re still here. You could’ve gone home and just forget this whole mess, but you stayed.”

“I hurt you, though.”

Youngjae shakes his head. “No…well, yeah, it sucked when you didn’t feel that way about me anymore, but it’s okay, because I feel even closer to you now. Which is all I really ever wanted,” he looks up and meets Jackson’s eyes. “Just…someone to be close to, who I feel bonded with. And that’s you, even without the romance. I should be thanking you, really.”

Jackson smiles, his eyes watering as he pulls Youngjae into a hug. He buries his face in the other’s neck, breathing in the familiar lavender scent that always seemed to linger on his skin and clothes. “My feelings never stopped,” he admits, lips brushing against Youngjae’s neck. “I thought they did, but I was wrong. Is that okay?”

“Yeah,” Youngjae says, his arms tightening around Jackson’s wait. “Yeah, that’s okay.”

 

_two months later_

“And then she was like – wait, shut up!” Jackson jumps as his phone begins to ring, the tune signaling a facetime message. He accepts the call from Youngjae, a big smile blossoming on his face when he appears on the screen. “Hey babe!”

“Heeey!” Youngjae waves, the camera coming in and out of focus. “I’m walking towards my gate right now!”

“Yaassss!” Mark cheers as he leans over Jackson’s shoulder, grinning when Youngjae laughs in response. “Can’t wait to see you, man!”

Jackson rolls his eyes as the two begin to chat, going over tonight’s dinner plans; just as he predicted, it didn’t take long for the two of them to become friends. “Hey, go away!” he says, elbowing Mark in the stomach. “Let me talk to my man in peace, shit!”

Mark snickers, but obeys Jackson’s request nonetheless. “You know you don’t have to be jealous,” Youngjae teases, his nose scrunching up. “I only have eyes for you.”

Jackson giggles, shaking his head. “I only have eyes for you, too.”


End file.
